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Amusing Self-catering Cottage Enquiries

Some of the enquiries and requests that we receive are extremely funny, therefore this page.  If you have a moment to spare, read and laugh with us.

Self-catering Enquiry 1

"Can you tell me if you have anything in St. Davids, Pembrokeshire, Wales, sleeping 4-5 with a large dog?"

Self-catering Enquiry 2:

Hello,

Please could you forward info on cottages for hire over the New Year period, preferably to sleep a maximum of 12 people and with an indoor pool/spa. The last item is not a must have item, but it would be nice, also, if we have to be split between more than one cottage on a site we would still be interested.

Fair enough - but do we have any cottages with pool sleeping 12 left? No chance!

Enquiry sent to the owner of a country house in Tayside, Scotland:

Dear Laird

this enquirer would ideally like cottage with a swimming pool for New Year  but your country house must have loads of space for partying, the odd ghost,.. etc. which surely compensates for the pool?

The Laird  replies:

.. Many thanks for your referral but apart from being booked for Christmas and New Year, we can of course call up our Ghosts at any time! The one with the chains and peculiar moan is always popular!!

We also have our very large pool about seven miles long and a quarter of a mile wide called Loch Voil which, if you chip the ice off it at new year, (It's also pretty cold in summer) you could have a nice swim! - if the Monster is not about!.....

More funnies to be added soon.  if you would like amusing self-catering anecdotes of your own added to this page then please email them to us.

Useful self-catering cottage searches

• cottages with beautiful interiors
• spacious cottages
• Last minute cottages
• Cottages for Christmas
• Cottages for New Year
• Self-catering cottages for half-term school holidays
• Angling holidays

Click on the cockerel at the top left of the page to return to the Country Cottages home page and extra self-catering accommodation options at any time.